public school kids

Public School kids

This was a term I heard a lot growing up, and it usually wasn’t in a favorable tone!

In my family, children fit into three categories: public school kids, private school kids, and home school kids. Public school was the mosh pit of education; dangerous, dirty; anything could happen in there. Private school was something I didn’t know much about, but it was seemingly a step up from public school. But home school? Ahh, we were the cream of the crop. We were the best. We were much smarter and better than everyone else! We read chapter books at earlier grade levels! We studied fancy stuff like Latin!

Yes, I was home-schooled. I may not have worn long denim skirts or been a part of 4-H, but I did take speech and debate classes at a church, learned math from my dad, language arts from my mom, and made friends at a home school sports co-op where I tried to learn tennis and sometimes had German lessons in a weird little conference room next to the pool.

It was a fun time!

I liked being home schooled, but I also always felt a little weird about the condescending tone my parents and friends would take when talking about public school kids. They were made out to be not as smart, not as cultured, and to have bad manners. “You’re so lucky to be homeschooled!” my mother would say. “Public school is awful!”

As I got older and had more friends who were not also home schooled, I found myself feeling a little jealous! These kids had football games, accelerated English classes, and boyfriends! They had football games! They had prom.

I realized at some point that my perception of public school had always been skewed. But a more saddening realization was this: often, the whole reason so many parents had decided to home school their kids in the first place, and were so critical of public school, was because of their own unfortunate experiences in the system.

My mom, for instance, had been overlooked in the public school system from first grade all the way to graduation. Deemed “lazy” and “unmotivated,” she barely passed classes all the way through 12th grade. State testing and bad teachers had made her intelligence invisible; signs of problematic home life were also ignored. In her twenties, my mom moved to Germany, became fluent in the language, and began collecting books; she’s now an avid writer and a book worm. My mom is incredibly intelligent and is an amazing artist to boot. However, the lack of resources she received in public school have impacted her whole life.

In these last few weeks of grad school, I have learned what public school ought to be and compared it to what it wasn’t for my mom. I’m thankful for the gravity with which our professors teach about inclusivity, support, diversity, reporting, and teaching strategies for all kids, not just some. I feel incredibly sorry for people like my mother, who were so damaged by incompetent teachers that when it came time to educate their own kids, they rejected the system entirely.

While I loved most parts of being home schooled, I am sorry I spent years thinking that kids who were not home schooled were not as smart, interesting, or important. Maybe that’s one reason I chose to become a high school teacher; the irony isn’t lost on me, that’s certain!

As strange as it might sound, my goals align with the values of many home schooling families. I want to offer each kid a chance to learn in a way that best suits them; to learn at their own pace, to be safe, to have room to be creative, and to stay a kid for as long as they need to. I am grateful that today, teachers are required to follow protocol that protects kids, and that there is such an emphasis on the individual.